I just emailed my Knight his daily task list for today. While I was typing his list, I decided to play with him a little. Task item number 10 for the day tells my Knight to find time to review our written rules because we will be playing a game this evening.
When we get home tonight I'm going to roll a pair of dice. The roll will randomly choose which of our rules is up for in-depth discussion. It's part of my attempt to help my Knight become aware and comfortable with his submission. We will explore how he feels about the rule, how following or acting on the rule makes him feel, and how or if that rule helps him to feel submissive to me. Then I'm going to ask him to tell me one thing I do, or he'd like me to do that increases his feelings of submission to me.
If he does a good job expressing his feelings, and he actually talks to me on the level I want, then I will allow him to come sometime in the next 24 hours.
If I am not happy with the level of communication I get from my Knight tonight, then there is absolutely no chance of an orgasm for him in the next 24 hours.
I'm really hoping the anticipation is fun for him. Early on I stopped telling him when he'd be allowed to orgasm, because it causes anxiety and stress for him. He was better off not knowing. But in my mind, this is different because I'm using his potential orgasm to encourage him to dig deep and tell me how he feels. We'll see. The next item on his list is to tell me if the game is causing him anxiety.
Part of our challenges with FLM is lack of open communication. My Knight has been pretty uncomfortable with this part of himself. He wants to be submissive to me, but doesn't want to talk about it, and doesn't want to understand exactly what he wants or why. I want that communication. I want my Knight to talk to me about what he wants from this, and what pushes those buttons for him. Tonight's game is a first step in that process. Plus, it's fun.