I feel like I am completely failing at this. Once again my knight is not following basic rules, and then trying to justify his actions. It's annoying, pointless, and makes me question my ability to maintain flr. On one hand, I feel like I'm being petty, but on the other hand his refusal to follow simple instructions is making a difficult situation (which he caused) even more difficult.
After we found out his severance check will be delayed, I told my knight not to spend money that is not absolutely necessary. We're not exactly sure when the severance check will be here. I know when the check will be issued, but I can't get a solid answer on whether it will be mailed or direct deposited. Obviously, that makes a difference in when we actually have the money to spend on bills.
On Saturday evening, I sent my knight to the store for a few things. When I send him to the store, he is expected to stick to the list. It's been that way for years..even before flr. If he wants to get anything not on the list, he's expected to send me a text to ask first. Again.. this is nothing new. That's been our general operating procedure for going on 9 years now, and he usually follows that rule. Except on Saturday he didn't. He decided to buy a few extra things that were not on the list. When I questioned him about it he said he "wanted to make you happy. You had a long day"
Yeah. NO. You were given a list, and and you were expected to follow that list. He's right.Saturday was a long, tiring day. In fact, it took me most of Sunday to recover. But.. buying me "a present" did not make me feel better. It just pissed me off, and made me feel like this whole flr dynamic is a waste of my time, energy and effort. The first time I tried to talk to him about it, he tried to make it sound like I was being silly and just a bit cheap. But, I told him he was wrong. If he wants to keep flr, then he is expected to follow my guidelines, rules and expectations 100% of the time. I told him that THIS is why I tend to drop the flr. Because he pulls dumb garbage like this, and that it makes me wonder why the hell I even bother.
He apologized, and said he'd do better. But, I'm not so sure. This is exactly the kind of dumb stuff I was dealing with before flr.. just on a lessor scale. Before flr, he would have spent $200 off budget, instead of just the $10 he spent on Saturday. But.. $200 or $10 it's the same thing. I asked him to do something, and I couldn't trust him to do it right.
I asked him once again, if he wanted to keep flr. He said yes. I asked him flat out what his is trying to accomplish with this behavior. His only response was "I just wanted you to be happy." Well.. I call bullshit. If he'd wanted me to be happy, he would have done what I asked of him.